March 1, 2008 
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When was the last time you just stopped and did nothing? We are a culture that has traditionally valued the movers and the shakers of society. There’s nothing wrong with productivity–we all need to feel useful, but there may be a danger that we transform into “human doings” rather than “human beings.” A couple of years ago, I attended a presentation by a neuropsychologist who explained that the rapid pace and endless stimulation of modern life is, very literally, re-wiring our brains. As he said, we are suffering from cultural attention deficit disorder. Often we need to be reminded to stop, pay attention, relax, and be mindful.
This is a lesson I’m still learning. I am the one who always loses the keys or the cell phone. If you are looking for the culprit who put cereal in the freezer or the ice cream in the fridge, you can usually look to me. I programmed the marquee feature on my computer to remind me to Relax…Breathe. On the other hand, I can be quite the couch potato and can take this stillness thing a little too far. In fact, sometimes I just watch quizzically as my partner darts from project to project in what I call “terrier mode.”
The most popular course at Harvard right now is one about Positive Psychology. The professor of that class has seen the number of students expand from 8 (with two dropping out) a few years ago to a present size of about 1400. In his first class, he typically introduces something new to Harvard students, the purposeful moments of silence that he inserts into his classes to let complex ideas digest, to do something Harvard students rarely do: be still. I’m going to experiment with doing this in my own life. I think he may be onto something.
Noted author Roger Walsh once told the story of trying get in touch with Thich Nhat Hanh (a Vietnamese monk who was once nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize by Martin Luther King, Jr). Thich Nhat Hanh has a retreat in France called Plum Village. Roger noted that if you call there, the phone will ring a bit until, finally, a monk answers. When he asked Thich Nhat Hanh about this issue, he was informed that the monks are taught to pause and take two breaths before answering. The sound of the telephone ringing is a reminder for the monks to be mindful. Consequently, when they do answer they can give full attention to the caller on the other end of the line. All because they have paused and are now acting with more awareness.
Our Western minds are so accustomed to a rapid, linear, flow of things. A pause can cause discomfort, as if something is not quite right. See what I mean? We are familiar with “monkey-mind” and can become annoyed when initially asked to sit still and meditate. There is this sneaky feeling that I should be doing something, anything, and that maybe somebody else somewhere is doing something and getting ahead of me. I have learned that being still is actually a skill, or maybe an art form that takes practice. In Creating True Peace: Ending Violence in Yourself, Your Family, Your Community and the World, Thich Nhat Hanh has a number of suggestions. One is to create a “breathing room” for yourself and your family. This can just be part of a room. He recommends that it have some flowers and a few cushions. This is a refuge, a place to go to calm the mind, heart, and spirit. This can also be done with a simple ritual. One of the interns at my center has a simple tea ritual which calms him in the middle of the afternoon.
Research shows that pausing to savor experiences makes us happier. One way this can be done is to create a mental snapshot of the experience: the sounds, the sights, the tactile experience, the taste, the smells. The last time I did this was in Ashland, Oregon at an art show. I sat for a moment and just absorbed the experience. It was a gorgeous day, bright sunny and warm. There were stripes of color everywhere. Appetizing aromas were wafting from the back of the restaurants nearby. One artisan had handmade silks that were as soft as a whisper. The sounds of conversations between artists, musicians, tourists, and locals mingled together. Even as I write this, that day comes back vividly as a happy memory, mostly because I was learning to take the time to stop and savor a magical moment rather than thinking about what time the next Shakespeare play started or whether or not the teenagers were getting bored. Luckily they were busily savoring the costumes found in the local thrift stores.
Ironically, as I was writing this article, I had to stop in the middle. I had clothes to pack, a conference to attend, etc. I was so busy I could not finish the article. My mind had become too busy to finish an article about mindfulness! But life has a way of catching up with you. I caught a horrible cold and and am now typing this with kleenex close at hand. When you don’t take the time to stop, I guess your physical body forces you to do so. Now that I have been forced to stop, I appreciate the simple things: like being able to breathe out of both nostrils at the same time or the healing warmth of Vicks Vaporub on my chest. I keep reminding myself that there is beauty in this stillness.
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